Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Gaffes and Gratitudes

I'm not feeling great this evening -- sore throat, stuffy nose, and that deep chest cough that makes me sound like a barking seal.  Traveling can sometimes do a bit of a number on me. 

I will be asleep shortly, but not before . . .


*Chewing off my manicure and, later, finding little pink specs in my teeth.  Festive.

*Wrestling to reload a giant stapler at work for 45 DAMN MINUTES only to find it's as simple as dropping the staples in the back end.  Over thinking and small machinery do not a love connection make.

*Ending up with my phone in the bathroom with me, no pocket to put it in and requiring the use of both hands.  If you think you could just tuck it into your bra without it falling out and shimmying all the way down your dress and almost falling in the toilet, you'd be wrong.

*Forgetting to put my veggie burger in the fridge at work . . . and eating it anyway.  How rancid can a veggie burger get?

*Attempting to Google Dr. Pornshei's contact information for one of my doctors -- Dr. PORN-shei.  So many boobs.  I had to give up.

*Somehow having "Promiscuous Girl", Katy Perry's "Part of Me" and "On the Wings of Love" on rotation in my head for a good 4 days.

*Wearing cotton pants for a Spin class.  Unsightly sweat marks is an understatement.  Thank God my sister had a sweatshirt I could wrap around my waist.

*Having my vacation include a trip to the dump.  If ever you are feeling really good and inspired about your life, go to the dump.  It will cure that right quick.


*A Colorado night sky.  I forget there are that many stars.

*Sweet smelling alfalfa on my clothes.

*The culinary perfection that is Taco Bell's chili cheese burrito. 

*The rogue packet of Emergen-C in my purse.  Sweet ambrosia when one is not feeling well.

*Alice B.'s wiggly bum and wonky ears greeting me at the airport.  She has recovered nicely from her glitchy pancreas.

*The Valentine's Day balloon D.R. got me that's still floating in our living room.  It's flying high.  It's flying high on the wings of love.

*My 86-year-old grandmother's face and hands.  I held them a bit longer this trip, know what I mean?

*She gave me one of her mother's rings.  Isn't it beautiful?


*Returning home.  Returning to work.  Returning to L.A. 

1 comment:

  1. I think a trip to the dump is in order for me! Love your gaffes and gratitude entries!